Be your own friend
We know what kindness and compassion are from the perspective of how we treat others, but wouldn't it be nice to take the same approach with ourselves?
Kristin Neff, one of the world’s leading experts on self-compassion, describes self-compassion as "the capacity to give ourselves the same kindness and care that we’d give to a good friend.” Kristen and colleagues have identified three main components of self-compassion:
#1 Mindfulness. This means leaning into uncomfortable feelings, rather than pretending they aren't there.
#2 Self-kindness. Showing yourself kindness as you would a loved one.
#3 Common humanity. Understanding that you are not alone in your struggles - we all experience challenging times.
These three components are a recipe for bringing more self-compassion into your life. Kristin says that with self-compassion "we motivate change from a sense of care." It’s encouragement and support as opposed to criticism and judgement, to motivate us to learn, grow and improve. And it’s a lot more effective.
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